You Won’t Call Me Tony – Elumelu’s Rebuke Sparks Fresh Debate Over Respect, Corporate Etiquette

• A viral video showing United Bank for Africa (UBA) Chairman, Tony Elumelu, correcting a female graduand of the bank’s Graduate Management Acceleration Programme (GMAP) 2026 for addressing him by his first name has triggered a heated debate online.

• Elumelu told the graduand she could address him as “Mr Elumelu”, “TOE” or “Chairman”, rejecting what he described as casual, foreign-style familiarity in a formal professional setting.

• While several Nigerians backed Elumelu, arguing that courtesy and respect require younger people to address older or senior professionals formally, others said his public image and frequent use of “TOE” could have encouraged a perception of familiarity.

• The incident has opened a wider conversation about changing workplace culture, generational differences and whether Nigerian professionals should retain traditional forms of respect while adopting more informal corporate interactions.

August 20, () — A brief exchange between United Bank for Africa (UBA) Chairman, Tony Elumelu, and a female graduand of the bank’s Graduate Management Acceleration Programme (GMAP) 2026 has sparked widespread discussion on social media over corporate etiquette and the appropriate way to address senior executives.

In a video circulating online, the graduand was seen interacting with Elumelu during an engagement when she addressed him simply as “Tony”.

Elumelu promptly corrected her, making it clear that he preferred a more formal mode of address.

“No, you won’t call me Tony… You call me Mr Elumelu, or TOE or Chairman”, he said.

He further explained that he was not comfortable with what he described as casual foreign-style familiarity in professional settings.

“I don’t subscribe to that kind of Oyinbo life, okay!” Elumelu added.

The exchange has since generated contrasting reactions, with many Nigerians backing the businessman’s position and arguing that the graduand should have recognised the formal nature of the occasion and Elumelu’s position as chairman of UBA.

One social media user, Uka, said that even if the graduand intended to use “Tony”, she should have attached an appropriate title, suggesting, “Mr Tony”.

Nelson shared a personal workplace experience to illustrate the importance of reading social cues, saying he once addressed his boss as “Sir” and “Mr.” until the boss specifically told him to use his first name. He said he reverted to formal titles with a new boss after changing jobs.

Another user, Afolabi, said Elumelu had the right to determine how he wished to be addressed, urging people to “remove sentiment” from the matter.

Lawal said his upbringing made it difficult for him to address older people by their first names, even when they were junior colleagues, adding that it would be even more difficult when dealing with someone much older and more senior.

Similarly, Adeleke argued that surnames should ordinarily be used with prefixes such as Mr, Mrs or Miss at formal gatherings, describing the graduand’s approach as inappropriate.

Patrick also criticised the decision to use Elumelu’s first name, advising young people to understand the environment they are in and “act accordingly”.

Several other commenters linked the incident to changing social norms and popular culture.

Kayday, for instance, referenced the influence of reality television and informal celebrity culture, citing the practice of addressing public figures by their first names.

Others, however, pointed to Elumelu’s own public image as a possible reason the graduand may have felt comfortable using his first name.

The businessman frequently identifies himself by his initials, “TOE”, on social media and has cultivated an accessible public persona, making him more familiar to younger Nigerians than the conventional image of a corporate chairman might suggest.

Some commenters therefore viewed the exchange as a clash between Elumelu’s public accessibility and the formal expectations of a professional environment.

Prosper argued that “Mr” or an official work title would ordinarily be appropriate unless the person expressly gives permission to be addressed by his first name.

Oke similarly maintained that courtesy should guide interactions, arguing that people should initially use formal titles until the person concerned gives permission for a more informal form of address.

“This is Africa, remember,” Emmanuel wrote, adding that courtesy should still be expected even in Western societies.

Others used humour to react to the incident, while some suggested that the graduand’s approach could have created a particularly awkward situation if she had been seeking employment.

Beyond the particular exchange, the debate has highlighted a growing tension in Nigerian workplaces between traditional expectations of hierarchy and respect and the increasingly informal culture promoted by younger professionals.

While some workplaces now encourage employees to address senior executives by their first names as a way of reducing hierarchy and encouraging openness, many Nigerians continue to regard titles and formal greetings as essential expressions of courtesy, particularly when interacting with older people or senior officials.

The Elumelu incident has consequently become less about the single word “Tony” and more about where Nigerian society draws the line between accessibility and respect, particularly in professional environments where age, position and cultural expectations continue to shape workplace relationships.

reports that Mr Tony Elumelu will, on Friday, August 21, formally retire from the Board of Directors of the United Bank for Africa Plc (UBA) upon the completion of the 12-year tenure limit prescribed for Non-Executive Directors of Banks by the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN